Fruity Crumble Bars of Amazingness

Okay.  So once upon a time there was this blog called F-Words and let me just tell you…it was a fantastic food blog.  Yeah…remember when I used to post recipes on here?  I’m not sure what happened bake stand but it could have something to do with the bake stand fact that I haven’t been feeling too inspired since the bake stand lately.  But either way, I felt inspired yesterday because I quit the bake stand and made these delicious little bars AND I remembered to take a picture because I’m not preoccupied by the bake stand.

I feel like I need to get something off my chest I hated doing the bake stand, but I just can’t think of what it was.

…and I ain’t talkin’ ’bout no peanut butter cookies.

Oh, now I remember.  I HATED DOING THE BAKE STAND!  I’d do my day with the kids (I have three kids under four – it’s not exactly a walk in the park – unless we go for a walk in the park that day, then I suppose it is exactly a walk in the park, but you get what I’m driving at here), then I spent EVERY NIGHT alternating between baking and BEGGING for sleep.  Then at the end of all that, I got to stand there, at the market, and watch all of my hard work melt in the sweltering heat, sweating like a fiend.  Then the icing on the cake (pun intended) was that I ended up making a cool $30 profit every week.  I know, it sounds spectacular, but it wasn’t.

I actually ended up going to a therapy session because of the stress of it all (combined with the financial horror that is my bank account), where my therapist said, “But you can bake in the day time can’t you?”  And I was frankly, just too stunned to answer.  I finally said, “A greater woman than myself could probably do it, but I’d end up putting a kid in the oven or making some other horrifying mistake.”  I started going into this huge defensive rant, then realized, this woman has no idea what the f*@k goes on in my house so maybe I should I rethink this whole asking her to therapize my BRAIN thing?!?!?!

Anyway…I have another appointment in 2 weeks.

Back to the bars.  Hey, that sounds like a movie or something.

Back to the Bars – The Lora Banks Story.  A chilling tale of a mother gone mad, searching for meaning in life in the bottom of every whiskey sour she can find in this 3 bar town.

Okay for real, back to the bars.

Yeah…it’s okay if you drool.  Because they are FANTASTIC.  I have made these four times now, and every time they are amazing.  I got the base recipe from my sister, Christa, who is the food whisperer.  Everything she makes is the best thing ever.

The crumble part of these bars is easy, foolproof and sooooo delicious.  It’s chewy AND crunchy AND sweet AND salty.  It’s sooo good.

The filling in the bars pictured here, came from a combination of these sweet little gifts of summer.

Mangoes, peaches, strawberries and cranberries.  Yeah, yeah ya meteorologist. I know that cranberries aren’t a traditional summer fruit but like your stinging criticism, I thought all of this sweetness could use a burst of sour here and there.  Forgive me.

I sold these at the bake stand and everyone that bought one talked about them later, or came back the next week to buy some more.  They’re pretty dang good, in case you couldn’t tell already.

So…before I say too much (too late):

To make your own Fruity Crumble Bars of Amazingness you’ll need:

For the crust/crumble part:

• 3 cups of quick oats
• 3 cups of flour
• 2 cups of brown sugar, lightly packed
• 1.5 cups of butter
• 2 tsp baking soda
• 1 tsp salt
• 1 serving of ELBOW GREASE

For the fruity filling:

• 5 – 6 cups of fruit (I used 2 mangoes, 1 peach, about 15 strawberries and just under a cup of frozen unsweetened cranberries)
• 1/2 cup white sugar
• 1/4 cup of flour
• 1/2 serving of ELBOW GREASE (I am an idiot, but I’m not erasing that)

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.  Line a 9X13″ pan with parchment paper, and leave enough sticking up over the sides of the pan so that you can grab them and lift the bars out later.  Like this:

   Photo Cred: Apartment Therapy

2. In a LARGE bowl, place all of the ingredients for the crust/crumble.  Remove your rings, watch and bracelet.  Place them in an envelope and mail them to me. I’m kidding.  Roll up your sleeves and you mix those ingredients together with your bare hands.  It should end up looking like this when you’re done:

   Note to self: Next time don’t use the “unappetizing” setting on the camera. Trust me, it’s good.

3. Press 2/3 of the mixture into the bottom of the pan.  Like really hard.  Smooth it out with the back of a spoon. Then set it aside.
4. Place the ingredients for your filling into a pot.  Stir it together then cook it over medium high heat until it reaches the thickness you’d like to see in your bars.  Not too runny.  If it’s too runny, add more flour.  If it’s too thick, add some water.  It’s very forgiving.  You can also skip this step entirely and put in a pie filling.  I used cherry pie filling once and it was delish.
5. Spread the filling over the crust you’ve created in the bottom of the pan.
6. Sprinkle the remaining crumb mixture over the top.
7. Place it in the preheated oven for 40 minutes, or until it’s nice and uniformly brown on top.
8. Remove from the oven and place it on a cooling rack to cool COMPLETELY!
9. Then, I usually put them in the fridge for about an hour, just to be safe.  But if you’re feeling daring (or want an excuse to eat the broken bars) then grab the parchment paper and pull them out in one big piece.
10. Cut into bars, the bigger the better, and eat’em up.  They also freeze really, really well.
11. Enjoy!

Well, I think I just remembered the second reason I stopped putting up recipes.  I could be the most annoying person in the world to take directions from!  Just ask my husband…ba dum dum chihhh.  Oh my.

Thanks for sticking this one out,

Lora